Weight for Me - In Between

I haven't written about my weight or exercising for a while.  Mostly because I've been at a bit of a stand still.  Like I was stuck hover around 180 lbs. at the beginning of this... now I've been hovering around 170 lbs.  I mostly see 170.5 on the scale... but sometimes I see 169.5  It's amazing how excited I can get over seeing the "6" right there in the middle.  It doesn't matter that it's just .5 away from being a "7".  That "6" always makes my day.

But I'm hovering.

I'm hovering and it's mostly my own fault.

I'm not on the treadmill like I should be.  I lost my momentum and can't seem to force myself back into it.

I'm not drinking my water like I should be.  I can feel the difference of not drinking enough.  My mouth is always dry.  I get more headaches.  I don't know why I don't drink water.

I'm not eating as well as I was (the temptation of Halloween candy is gone... but now we're moving onto the Thanksgiving... and Christmas).

My weight and my motivation is hovering.

On top of being stuck... 170 lbs. is not good for me.  It should make me feel better about myself.  Better than 180 lbs.  Unfortunately for me, 170 lbs. puts me right smack dab in the middle of a jeans size.  Size 16 is a little bit too big for me.  Size 14 is a little too snug in the waist.  Size 16 are baggy... and while they're comfortable, I always feel self conscious about looking sloppy.  Size 14 have a better fit for my butt and thighs... but because of my shape they FIT my waist.  While they might look like a better fit, I'm left feeling uncomfortable.  I weigh less... but I feel chubbier.

I know what I should be doing... I'm just not doing it.  And because I'm not doing it I'm just stuck.  Stuck here "in between".  In between is not a happy place to be.